


Paint it Black

by teahoneydrop



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blood Magic, Fated Lovers, Jaemin is a witch in the past, M/M, Magic, Minor Character Death, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-24 22:01:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30078990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teahoneydrop/pseuds/teahoneydrop
Summary: Maybe it was Fate. That his feet once again land on the same land where he died once. And his curse comes breathing fire.But maybe it was Fate trying to tell them something when it bring their soul back together." — as these seas ravish my flesh, and the remnants of my everything, my rage will burn brighter than hell itself the moment I'm born again. He will never forget my face and my scream until the end of his days as I will never forget his. An eye for an eye, Lee."
Relationships: Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Other NCT members - Relationship
Comments: 7
Kudos: 8





	1. no colors anymore, I want them to turn black

**Author's Note:**

> Had been a while since I actually write something. My partner said my writing style changes, so I’m not sure either. I’m trying to get myself to write again hence this story. This is sort like a present to myself. 
> 
> There’s no solid plot to it, I’m just writing them as they go. Just trying to find a reason to write a witch reincarnation theme and revenge, if that’s even related at all. Oh, and I’m new with Nomin so there’s there, ig. 
> 
> bgm : Ciara Paint it Black. — Same as the title bc i’m not original. and i’m shitty at summary.

> PRESENT.

The sounds of the announcement over his head goes without ringing, ebb like a passing sound that soon echoes into silence. Jaemin dives further into the comfort of his muffler. The deep baby blue color, with pink lining of the muffler looks little faded, courtesy of it being used constantly over the years. 

His head is still mulling over the court ruling, and his anxieties that crippling over the edge ever since Renjun has woken him up early to get ready with an overly concerned face. It’s rare to see the chinese male in such a frantic manner. Usually, they would start the day with light banter and Jaemin’s quirk to purposely use Renjun Moomin’s mug so the smaller erupts into bullets of words of annoyance. 

But it wasn’t the same for that morning. His nervousness came before he could even mumble good morning. His eyes crazed. Renjun’s quite mumbling under his breath while he moves front and back to get ready without saying much. Even during the whole ride toward the court, both of them have kept mums. Jaemin wanted to offer the comfort of his hands toward the smaller one, but he couldn’t - he had his own hell to deal with that he allowed himself to be selfish for once. One look to his side, Jaemin knows Renjun appreciates the stillness around them. 

When they arrived, Renjun did his part. So does he, but words come difficult when his hands were shaking horribly and the attorney’s request for him to recite back what happened back then in the cabin - they just triggered his panic attack and the court had to take a five minute break before continuing. Jaemin was grateful that amongst them two, Renjun picks up his pieces quite calmly, that it scares him a bit. 

Even now, while the sounds of the rapid announcement from station to station, Renjun didn’t open his mouth, merely grabbing onto Jaemin’s end of coat, as if he wanted to make sure that Jaemin was there, beside him. 

So Jaemin scots closer, until there’s no existence space left and leans his head on Renjun’s shoulder that he allows himself to let out the tears that both of them had been holding on to faintly.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


> THE FIRST 24 HOURS - 6 HOURS IN.

For the first 24 hours, Jaemin tries to hold onto his sobbing. It failed because he was scared. His legs growing numb and his wrist - they started to ache, with the constant rubbing of his flesh against the harshness of the ropes material. His head throbs from the thrashing around, spits drools over his chin because of the rolled over cotton shirt being shoved down his throat. It’s suffocating at best. 

He was in the bathroom of the cabin. Left cold in the bathtub full of water, shaking, void of the light and anything that was happening to him. Renjun’s scream has dissipated from the outside and he no longer hears any sort of movement. 

The beating of his heart was beating million miles per beat and the longer he stayed there, the need to cry once again took over his whole body. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


> 6 HOURS PRIOR

  
  


They wandered around, for hours in the small town, visiting every bit of available shops. Exploring every nook and cranny, tumbling laughters and colorful paper bags filled with little trinkets and souvenirs. Jaemin perhaps has purchased more than he should and Renjun was just there, beside him, nagging over their overspending. Yukhei boisterous laughter over their matching keychains and Dejun’s chattering about the next destination they were about to visit. 

The visit was impromptu. One of the owners from the old bookstore they went into has told them about the tale of the ruins castle, not far from here. Curious, Dejun has beckoned all of them to visit, so they agreed. They have a few more hours to spend before dinner after all. 

“Maybe we should check them out,” Dejun places the book he was checking out earlier back on the shelves. It was a hardcover about how to start seedling for beginners. “It’s not like it would cost us anymore than it should.” 

Jaemin didn’t butt in, content with just tagging along. He went to the counter to pay for his mineral water, when the tagline of today’s newspaper caught his attention - ‘Two women were attacked by mysterious men while on vacation. No survivors.’ 

Yukhei made a beeline to his side, nudging at the same newspaper that Jaemin was checking, “It’s gruesome.” 

“What?” 

“I read the story online. They got attacked while sleeping. I don’t know how they managed to break into the resort.” 

The hair on his neck stands, “Is it around here?” 

Yukhei shakes his head, sipping on his drink, “No, it’s far. I would freak out too if it’s somewhere near. Don’t think Renjun or Dejun would appreciate the scare tho.” 

Jaemin didn’t ask more, nor Yukhei even bothered to explain in detail the news. They paid for their stuff and walked back to the car. 

  
  
  
  


The ruined castle took a fifteen minutes drive away from the town. It was told that apart from the ocean view of the place, the castle was said to hold magic in the forgotten wall of the ruins. Aside from the rumbles of broken castle walls and rocks, it was a wonder in itself because the only section that held its majestic architecture of the original state of the castle was the throne hall. It looked like it hadn't been touched by single living things or nature. Hence the belief that the castle itself has magic resides in those walls. 

They arrived soon enough. Jaemin closes the car door behind him, craning his neck upwards to witness a bit of the said castle that can be seen from their place. The sea breeze was a bit windy, strong, blowing his combed blonde hair askew. His camera dangled against his neck. 

“Do we need to climb all the way to the top?” Yukhei’s voice bombs through the air, shielding his eyes from the breeze. 

It was salty though, and must have come from the ocean nearby. They could hear the sound of the waves hitting through the shores. 

Renjun clears his throat, zipping his bag, “Yep. Better be quick. Who knows we could watch the sunset from up there.” 

Jaemin waits for Renjun to fall in steps with him as they walk toward the start of the hills, where the entrance gate was located. They looked a bit old due to the years, and there were few torn fabrics tied along the poles of the gate. 

He has his hands slopes around Renjun’s elbow, as they climb uphill toward the mentioned ruins. The other two were already far further. Their figures slowly disappear from Jaemin’s sight, leaving only echoes of Dejun occasionally shrieks of surprise and Yukhei’s laughter. 

The said ruins are located a bit up on the hill, [surrounded by the trees and the greenery of nature](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/60/Kozanji_Kyoto_Kyoto07s5s4592.jpg/1280px-Kozanji_Kyoto_Kyoto07s5s4592.jpg) that Jaemin couldn’t stop photographing them into static images in his camera. 

They hadn't seen the real thing, however, even from the steps inching closer, Jaemin could feel something in the air. He bits his lower lips in awe, before stopping in his track to admire the images captured in the camera. Checking them, just in case. It would be regrettable if the picture didn’t catch every single corner of the views. 

“They look amazing,” Renjun peers over his shoulder, mouth tilted upwards in amazement. Jaemin hums in agreement. They would surely miss this serenity. 

They arrived in front of the entrance gate of the said ruins, a simple structure of two poles without the connecting horizontal lintel or tie-beam seen on most torii, is another feature that left them in awe - left and it’s right guarded by the Cryptomeria trees surrounding all of the buildings, 50 to 80 feet tall. 

It almost feels nostalgic - the walks through the outskirts of the outer curtain wall. It feels like walking back into a piece of memory that he has no repertoire of in his lifetime. Never mind the hauntingly beautiful structures of the remnants of what used to be a castle long ago. The ivy and the greens that have found their way to grow and swirls against the tiles of the curtain wall. Even the stairs that lead inside the inner ward have fallen off, cracked and amongst them, the ground have filled it in with grass and small dandelions. 

The towers — two of them have seen better days. And the whole ruins, Jaemin could imagine the bold ivory color of the castle, stood there as if conjured from the storybook that he had read when he was a child. Renjun gave him a side glance, before walking forward leaving him alone to admire the walls. 

It’s odd, how his mind frantically starts to imagine the colors and the images of the halls of this castle. The long hallways full of the royal portraits, down to the generation. The blue and ivory flags that adorn every corner, and the water dragon sigil sewn across each piece of the mantels and drapes in the castle. 

He traced every bit that his fingers could reach, eyes glinting with newfound amazement and curiosity when the sounds of Dejun calling out for their name snaps him out from the reverie. 

Jaemin walks forth, deep into the ruins. He passes through the main gates, sees the building of what used to be a chapel, with the way the mosaic of the windows glimmer from the light shone through it. He could hear them — Renjun’s sharp intake of breath and Yukhei never ending ‘wow’ that tumbled out of his mouth, so he fastened his steps and stumbled into the room, where the other three were standing. 

It was the throne room. Jaemin turned to his back, making sure that what he was seeing in front of him was real, whether the hallway he was walking passed earlier was meant to be a passageway to this said room. 

The room — [the throne room](http://thiagoklafke.com/misc/throneroom/TempleOfUtu_Final_03.jpg), Jaemin could feel the power that emanates from the sole throne that was situated on top of probably six platforms of the ground. The high windows behind them, it welcomes the shines from the sun outside, and just as that, the sun shines directly toward the throne. It was — he was at loss of words. 

High windows, dusty tapestries that hang on their high ceilings and walls. The [dome](http://thiagoklafke.com/misc/throneroom/dome.jpg) on top of their head, it allows the view of the clear sky. 

Yukhei whistles, “When that old man says that the throne room was left untouched, I was a bit skeptical.” 

“Yeah?” Renjun laughs, looking around. His smaller figure twirls around to capture the room into his brain. Dejun was quick to follow, for he ran toward Yukhei’s side, pulling the taller male to go closer toward the said throne. 

It looked like this room was barely aged thousands of years like the other part of the castle. But it wasn’t the throne that captured Jaemin to stay, it was the other door that connected to the throne room. 

He watched his friends still roaming around, admiring the infrastructure of the ruins, deemed it was okay if he did a bit of exploring by himself. There was something about the door that asked him to push through it and go inside. 

Gingerly, Jaemin left the throne room to approach the oak door. It’s a bit suspicious how the oak of the door could still stand tall, but as weird as it is, there was no solid reason as to why the throne room looked like it was before them too. He had decided to throw off the logic by the windows. There are things that are better left unquestioned. 

This whole ruins could be such a big tourist attraction but it was left as a secret that only the folk from the town know — speak of its existence through the whispers of people who know about it. 

The throne room was situated on the higher part of the main building, connected to the lower floor where the ballroom was. Unlike the throne room, the ballroom was empty, left with strong pillars and podium. However, it’s still as big, compared to any movies he had watched on screen, walls glinting and beautiful. 

Sad, Jaemin ponders. It was empty, spares of the woods and tree trunks that reached inside the hall. He waltzes across the empty floor, as his footsteps echo behind him. 

By time he realized where he was going, Jaemin was merely inched closer to the edge of the cliff that separated the end of the hill and the void that surged down into the crashing ocean’s arm. His breath stuck on his throat, and his legs turned weak as he fell to his knees, eyes wide. 

Then he heard the scream. The bloody curls of anguish scream that could tear through the skies above. Sweats broke through his forehead as he blindly searched around. 

Who’s screaming?

“NA JAEMIN!” 

Jaemin immediately searched for the source of the voice, turning his head toward the ruins and seeing Renjun dashing toward him in a flash of light - pulling him on his legs and dragging him further away from the cliff. 

Renjun slaps his shoulder multiple times, face red, “what the hell are you thinking about? Do you want to fall that badly?” 

“No,” Jaemin weakly argues. He turns his head back toward the cliff. There was something there that he couldn’t put his fingers onto. Then he faces Renjun back, “I heard someone screaming, Jun.” 

“No one is screaming, Nana!” fumed Renjun. “I was looking for you everywhere! I was calling out your name for hours but you did not reply!” The smaller male’s chest heave up and down, seemingly out of breath. Jaemin feels guilty. Renjun looked like he was inches away from bawling his eyes out in front of him. 

He was about to open his mouth when Renjun shook his head, “Let’s go home, okay? It’s late. We promised to go back before dinner.” 

Leaving him no other option, Jaemin followed Renjun to walk out of the area. They passed through the ruins once again, however Jaemin didn’t see the ballroom that he was waltzing around before, nor the passageway that he had walked through. He wanted to ask, but from the look of it, Renjun looked exhausted enough so he dropped it. 

They meet both Yukhei and Dejun at the end of the hills. And they respectively got into the car as Yukhei drove them back to their cabin that they rented with the company of the radio that Dejun had deliberately turned on because it felt too quiet. 

  
  
  
  


When they got back to the cabin, it was dark. Dejun offered to take the chunk of woods at the back so they could light up the fire in the hearth inside. Jaemin sends him a grateful smile his way and goes inside to prepare their dinner. 

Yukhei placed all the paper bags that contained their groceries on the table available in the kitchen area and excused himself upstairs, leaving Jaemin with Renjun, whose back facing him by the sink. 

“I’m sorry for worrying you,” Jaemin started, fingers toying with the end of the paper bag, tearing them a little. He didn’t mean to, honestly. Jaemin wanted to tell Renjun about the ballroom and the cliff, it was bugging him big time all the way through their drive home. However there was a weight settled down on his chest that he resorted to just buried it down and tried to focus on making sure Renjun isn't mad at him. 

Renjun didn’t reply for a couple moments and then he sighed. Jaemin’s face lit up as he let out a victorious smile - he knew he had caught Renjun’s full attention. Begrudgingly, Renjun did turn his body to face Jaemin, whose forehead ceased into a frown. 

“Don’t do that ever again.” He warns, knife in his hand as sort of warning.

Jaemin flashed him a sheepish smile, so Renjun rolled his eyes. 

After things settled amongst them two, he helped Renjun with the rest of the ingredients. Dejun joined them after half an hour, face smudged with charcoal as he slithered inside the kitchen, complaining, “that stupid wood splinter pricked into my finger. It hurt like bitch. This is even worse than having a paper cut at the office.” 

“Maybe if you decided to wear the glove that Yukhei placed beside the axe yesterday, it wouldn’t hurt,” Jaemin supplied, cackling over the pot of bubbling kimchi stew on the stove. Renjun approached his side and dumped the final ingredients inside the stew and closed the stove. 

Almost immediately, realization splattered across Dejun’s face at his own idiocracy. Causing Jaemin to cackle louder. “Yep, the uncle gave Yukhei the glove yesterday when he showed Yukhei around.”

Dejun squinted his eyes, “And you didn’t tell me that beforehand?” 

“Because I thought you knew!” 

Dejun throwed the wet clothes that Jaemin used to wipe the table earlier to Jaemin’s face, clenching on his teeth. “You asshole, I did not know.” 

“Not like it’s my fault, dude.” 

Unconsciously, the corner of Renjun’s lip also tilted upwards into a small smile. Jaemin did point it out but the smaller denied it, so they let it go. The dinner preparation went well, with the occasional banters tumbling from their mouth. Yukhei joined soon after, hair still wet after a long shower he took, going over to his boyfriend’s side to help clean the table. 

Soon, the little kitchen was filled with the delicious aroma of the kimchi tofu stew on the stove and other dishes that Jaemin have helped Dejun to cook. They huddled over at the table, taking their seat - plates, spoons and chopsticks being passed around afterwards before they silently dived into the delicacy, too famished to bother with the sudden quietness that took over, minus the occasional loud slurps of the hot stew petrenating through the air. 

“Man, had been a while,” Yukhei chirped, chopsticks hovering over his half empty bowl of rice, followed by everyone’s hum of agreement. Renjun leans over to take the last scop of the kimchi stew in the pot in the middle of the table, before giving it to Jaemin to put it aside, along with the other empty plates that they had finished. 

“Too bad the other couldn’t join us,” Jaemin added, bumping shoulders with Renjun beside him. 

Dejun softly laughed, “Yeah, it would be much merrier. I’m sure Hyuck would love the change of scenery.”

“Dude, he’s busy,” Yukhei supplied, frowning. His left hand, who’s not holding the chopstick, stretches over Dejun’s chair, looking way too comfortable in his seat. 

Jaemin rolls his eyes in response, putting his chopsticks down after swallowing the last piece of his beef. “Busy with his boyfriend.” 

The taller amongst them snorts at Jaemin’s reply. “You would understand if you have one. But too bad you don’t,” Yukhei bantered back, shaking his head as he passed his now empty bowl to Jaemin for the later to collect.

“Dejun, tame your boyfriend down before I do it myself,” Jaemin warns, but there’s no malice in his tone. 

“Oh, quit it. Before I silence all of you.” Renjun interrupted, standing up from his seat as he takes the piles of bowls that Jaemin collected earlier - placing them into the sink. “Come on, let’s clean this and all of us could rest for real. Today’s so hectic.” 

They cleaned up the kitchen - Jaemin was washing the dishes, while Yukhei collected all the rubbish to throw. Dejun and Renjun cleaned up the table and the other area until it was squeaky cleans. 

Afterwards, they gathered at the porch in front of the cabin, basking in the coldness of the night outside in nature. It was peaceful with the occasional sounds from the crickets. The place was tree and birdsong altogether in one sensory palette and Jaemin found serenity in the sight that beheld him, his best friends huddling closer by each side. 

Dejun hums softly to a song. 

“I wish this day could stay.” 

It was a wishful thinking, Jaemin thought as he leaned back using his hand as support, glancing to the vastness of the black sky above him. There were no stars blanketing over their head. The moon shined as bright, but it looked lonely. 

His thoughts slowly trailed off from its track, back to the ballroom and the cliff where he almost fell earlier. And the mysterious screams that until now haunted the back of his head like a mantra. 

It stayed, circling over his head until Dejun announced that he was exhausted and excused himself out to go to bed. Yukhei, seeing that his boyfriend was making his move to go back inside, inhaled the last drag of his cigarette and stubbed the butt of the nicotine against the floor he was sitting, before throwing them inside the trash bin nearby. 

“You should stop smoking, dude,” Jaemin offhandedly says when Yukhei passed beside him. The said man gives him a side eye, flicking him off - Jaemin laughed though, before bidding the both of his friends goodnight. 

Then, there was him and Renjun left at the porch. The smaller male was hunching over his phone, fingers typing on the screen at a rapid speed, lips jutted out into a pout. “Go to sleep, jun.” 

Renjun merely hums, sending another bubble of chat to whoever he was talking to, then he closed his phone, raising up from his position. “You should too. Tomorrow is the last day, we might as well go out early to visit the rest of the town.”

“I will.”

“Night, Nana.” 

Jaemin sends the others off with a small wave, before staring back into the void of darkness in front of him, deep in thoughts. 

  
  
  
  


It was nearing midnight when Jaemin broke out of his stupor. Giving the outside view of their cabin a last glance, he pushed himself up, gripping onto his cardigan closer to his body. 

His steps halted when he heard a distant wood break in the distance, but he shrugged it off, too tired to bother. It was getting cold too. His body felt extremely stiff and sticky that he rushed inside, locking the door behind. He needs to rinse off before getting to bed. 

The light to the kitchen was left opened, along with the pantry at the back. The heath was barely lighting up the living room, leaving trails of tiny sparks from the ashes that crackles in the silence. Jaemin stared at them for a while, lingering at the corner of the hallways that separates the area and the bedrooms. 

He blinked, then wordlessly walked toward his room at the end of the hallways, adjacent to Renjun’s room. He passed through Yukhei and Dejun’s shared room, the hushed conversation behind the closed door signaling that they aren’t asleep yet and Renjun’s door. It was quite, except the yellow bedroom light that peeks through the cracks of the door underneath. 

  
  
  
  


Fresh out of the shower and new change of clothes half an hour afterwards, Jaemin was lounging lazily on the bed, basking in the comfort of the comforter under his skin. His phone was connected to the wall charger, shuffling on Jaemin’s playlist as the said male closed his eyes, ready to welcome the drowsiness raking upon his consciousness. 

It was still. Jaemin counted the number in his head. He’s too lazy to move now, to turn off the table lamp beside his bed. 

Half past one hundred and thirty — Renjun’s shrill voice penetrates through the air. 

_131, 132._

Alarmed, Jaemin jolted out of his bed, rushing toward his door. 

_133, 134, 135._

“Renjun, what the fuck-“ Yukhei’s hoarse voices was heard, Dejun following suit as the door slammed open because of Renjun’s sudden screaming. 

_136_. 

Jaemin got a hold of his door knob, ready to twist it open when he heard a harsh, loud slam of something heavy against his door. Startled, he let go of the door. 

_137, 138._

“Yukhei!” 

It was Dejun. Jaemin noted, his eyes blown wide as he was frozen still in his place. 

_139_. 

Silence. There was just the stillness of a silence. 

_140_. 

  
  
  
  


All the lights in the house were suddenly shut off, a total black out. He lost count, his feet staggered off behind him, waiting for something but nothing happened. Gathering his last bit of courage, he blindly reached over toward the study table near the window for his phone.

Soon as the end of his finger felt the rough edges of the table, Jaemin leaned over to slide open the curtain, letting the light of the moon outside to shine in through his room, but it didn’t do him anything good. The location of his room was blocked by the tree outside, preventing the moonbeams from coming in. 

“Fuck,” he bursted out, fumbling over the surface of the table for his phone. The playlist was still playing and he felt sweats running through his forehead. His fingers were shaking as he began to unlock his phone and open the flashlight. 

He remembered the steps. Three steps away from his door was Renjun’s bedroom. From there, it was only a matter of five to six steps toward Yukhei and Dejun’s shared room. Before the black out, Yukhei and Dejun definitely had come out from the room to check on Renjun. He didn't know what was the loud thud that slammed against his door earlier and Jaemin desperately wished it wasn’t anything bad. 

With so, he turned around, walking toward the door. 

Jaemin pushed open the door, not realizing the creaking sound of his bathroom door behind him slowly unlatched. 

What greeted him when he opened the door was an empty space. There was no sign of Yukhei nor Dejun at the hallway. Renjun’s door was left ajar. 

Jaemin flashed the hallway using the flashlight, eyes racking around him. His feet were cold, as he began to move forward. However, he didn’t go far. There were watery sense of substances stuck to his feet that Jaemin shakily flashed the floor of the cabin with the light. 

Red. 

It was the bold crimson color that invaded his vision. Panic surges through his body as his head begins to think of the worse yet happening. 

He followed the trail, with the help of the flashlight through the end of the hallways toward the living room area. The loud beating of his heart didn’t soothe his nerves, as he kept his eyes open, afraid to even blink. 

When the living room came into view, he saw the light and saw the unconscious figure of his best friend, Renjun, lying on the couch, right in front of the hearth. The fire has totally died down. 

Without further thinking, he ran toward Renjun, putting the phone down to his side as he kneeled beside the unconscious male. He cradled Renjun’s head into his left palm, right hand slapping the other cheek to wake him up. “Renjun, wake up,” he croaked out. 

“Oh lord,” Jaemin turned around, looking for any sign of Yukhei and Dejun around, but there were only the two of them. 

Then, it happened in a flash. 

Jaemin was about to continue trying to wake Renjun up when Dejun barged into the space, his breathing batted, limping. There was blood on his hand and stigs stuck in his hair. Then he spotted Jaemin, kneeling on the floor before his gaze turned toward the end of the corner. 

“JAEMIN, RUN,” he yelled and from the corner of Jaemin’s eyes, he saw someone - a figure approached them. 

Jaemin fell to his butt. There was a loud thud, but Dejun’s screaming was loud, asking him to run. 

Shocked, Jaemin quickly tried to get on his knees, trying to crawl forward, away like Dejun had told him to do but a rush of pain surged on the back of his head so he fell back, staggered like a limbless doll onto the floor. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


> THE FIRST 24 HOURS, 4 HOURS IN. 

  
  


Jaemin loses count of the hours. It’s driving him insane at this point. He woke up, eyes greeted with darkness to register that he was blindfolded, the back of his head throbbing so viciously and he was bound everywhere else too. His mouth was gagged with cloth, down his throat and he felt like puking so bad, heaving so loudly to catch on his own breath. His hands were tied behind his back, so does his leg. He tried to move around, thinking if he was still in the living room but it was dark. And cold. 

The surfaces were rough, slippery. Then he discovered that he was dragged back into his bedroom - into his bathtub to be more precise. His room was the only room that had a bathtub, much to the other’s dismay when they each picked their own respective room when they arrived at the cabin. 

He had cried, for the first two hours. His lung hurt so bad from the lack of air, and he feels disgusting. He remembered the state Dejun was in before he passed out earlier, and the panic settled in back. Then, Renjun who seemed to be unaware, lying unconscious on the couch in the living room. 

He tried to get out, groping on the rope or whatever that were used to bound him but it was too tight. 

There were footsteps outside, and his breath hitched, eyes glued to where he supposed the door of the bathroom where, waiting for them to be pushed open. 

Instead, his ear sight was greeted with Renjun’s sobbing, and the sound of other heavy things being dragged inside. 

Gathering all of his energy, Jaemin tried screaming into the cloth, kicking his leg against the bathtub with his might. 

Renjun, Renjun. I’m here. 

It probably was his mistake, he didn’t think it through. He heard the door open and the sound of a boot against the marbled tile of the bathroom and whistling. 

The hair on his neck stands, as Jaemin scoots behind the bathtub, a failure attempt to run away with his bound state. 

He stopped whistling. Jaemin feels a figure looming over him, and a hand caressing through his lock. He pushed the hand away, knocking it off with his head. 

Subsequently, Jaemin was shoved face down to the edge of the bathtub. He whimpered as he felt the blood flow out of his nose. His eyes spinned beneath the cloth that blindfolded him. 

The hand came back, now grabbing a fist of his hair, pulling them backward. Jaemin felt dizzy, the pain from getting shove against the tub hasn't subsided yet. 

“Oh, aren’t you dirty, sweetheart?” - water, he heard the twirl of the pipe and water rushed in, pooling inside the tub. Jaemin screamed against the cloth, shaking his head around, but the hold on his hair was strong. 

Outside, Renjun started to scream. The smaller male was calling out for help - calling out for their names - “JAEMIN, HELP. HELP ME,” and other strings of call for help. So Jaemin cried, helpless in his state, afraid of what was happening. Anxieties started to double over when he felt the water rising inside the tub, up to his waist level. His shorts were drenched, so does the lower part of his shirt. 

He knew, he knew what the attacker would do. There’s part of consciousness in him that knows he will be shoved down into the water and he starts to thrash around, hoping with all his might by deity power he can escape. 

However, he couldn’t. Much to his suspicion, the attacker pushed him forward, dived into the water. It was quick, Jaemin forgot to hold his breath properly so when his body surged inside the water, he accidentally gulped a few of the water - his body thrashing inside an invisible prison. The cloth around his mouth was drenched and his nose constricted due to lack of air. He tried to spit the cloth out, grasping for his last breath of the icy-water; his throat burned as if a thousand needles had been plunged into it. 

He wanted to cry out for help, calling out for Renjun outside, but he couldn’t bring enough air into his lungs. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


There was a dangerous tint of betrayal tasted against his tongue as the door to the royal library was pushed open by the soldiers. He doesn’t want to assume, but it was too much of coincidence when one of the knights of the King has dragged him off his seat. The book that he was reading earlier fell with a loud thud onto the floor. 

Jaemin tried to snap his hands off from the harsh hold, “What is the meaning of this?” - His eyes were red in anger. His emotion still hasn't recovered from the passing of his princeling. Half part of himself had felt it was being robbed. And the library was the place he had tried to soothe for comfort. 

In all entirety of his stay, he had chosen to stay within the wall of this cursed castle because of his blood-bound brother, who were forced to marry the Old King when their coven were attacked by bandits years prior. His families were slaughtered in front of his eyes, when his brother rushed into their tent and had pulled his tiny hand off the ground and make a dash out of the forest, into the open road, where they continued to walk until the royal carridged has stopped and the Old King has taken interest of his brother’s beauty. 

He was pulled apart from his brother the moment they arrived at the castle, and his brother was taken away from him. Since then, he rarely saw his brother’s figure around, only the whispered of the Old King’s marriage amongst the kitchen staff. There, he met Renjun, a fellow healer who worked for the infirmary in the castle. 

Trying to get used to the routine inside the castle was rough. He doesn't speak much of the native language they used, only familiar with the comforting sounds of his language. And if the Old King was greedy, and obsessive toward beautiful things, it doesn’t compare to the crowned Queen, herself. 

The first time he met her, she was towering over his brother’s figure on the floor. His brother’s face was red after being slapped, as strings of insults came out of her mouth. Flared with rage, Jaemin had bewitched the crowned Queen, squeezing her throat shut with the shadow of his magic until his brother pulled him off his stupor, fears swirling in his orbs. 

“You-” The Queen stammered out. Her face was redder than her brother’s cheek, sinister looks registered on her face as she realized the usage of magic in her presence. 

“You dare use magic in this castle- You- you, you people are witches,” his brother’s eyes blew wide at that, before he kneeled in front of her, begging of her pity, that he will do anything for as long the Queen didn’t harm Jaemin. 

It took a while for the Queen to process but she had agreed. They had made a deal, and his brother had shunned of his memory about that day - leaving him clueless except for the day where he watched his brother walk in front of the chapel, robbed of the royalty weight upon his shoulder as Jaemin watched them exchange vows to bound his brother and the Old King for eternity. 

He was patient. His brother has advised him to keep their secret low, so Jaemin followed through with Renjun’s help to be one of the healers. He was plotting for their escape, when the fateful day came and he met the youngest princeling of the said Queen - all smiley, although there were open wounds gashed through his abdomen. His eyes turned into crescent when he smiled, as Jaemin pressed the wounded to stop the bleeding, unfazed by the pain. 

Compared to the Queen and the first Prince, his crescent eyes princeling had made its way through Jaemin’s nice list. He grew fond of the princeling, and started to learn to trust the said prince with all of his secrets. 

Things spiral for the worst. Three months after the wedding, the castle was shaken with the news of his brother’s treasant. The First prince has found his brother crouching by the Old King’s side, dagger deep inside his chest and blood on his hand. 

Jaemin wanted to stop them from dragging his brother, but his princeling had held him to the ground, whispering that if he dared to interfere, things would get complicated. 

He was wishing that it was circumstances that put his brother beside the dead king’s side. But the court had its ruling that his brother would be punished to death, for killing the Old King. 

On the day of the Old King’s supposed funeral, it was the day of his brother’s beheading. Jaemin had begged to see him and Renjun helped him a night prior to sneak inside the prison. 

The prison was cold. This wasn’t supposed to be his brother’s space, he deserved more. Jaemin held the torch closer to the prison’s gate, and saw his brother’s sunken face. His lips were blotchy, eyes red. His cheeks have lost fat, no longer plum and crimson like it used to be. His complexion was pale, and it hurt. Jaemin’s heart hurled in anger, and pain. His brother was shackled by feet with an iron - that Jaemin knew, the Queen had set it up. 

“Listen to me, Jaemin,” his brother’s brittle voice rang against the coldness of the prison, “you need to survive here. The Queen cannot hurt you because she had made a blood pact with me to seal a promise that she won’t harm you, by any instants. And to keep her mouth silent of your birth status.”

Jaemin shakes his head, “No, no, no. There’s no way I’m doing this alone.” 

But his brother didn’t falter, his grip on Jaemin’s wrist in between the poles of the prison were tight, “Live for me, Jaemin. Live for our sisters, and brothers. Remember their name. Seek revenge when the day comes. Do it for me. Promise me, Jaemin. Please,” his brother begged, so Jaemin nodded, tears streaming down his face like an open river. 

Renjun comes after a while, dragging Jaemin away because the sun is about to rise and they need to get out of the prison if they don’t want to get caught. 

He could hear his own screaming when he saw his brother’s head roll to his feet that day, and the blood of his brother flowed against the marble and the Queen’s smiles. 

Holding on was difficult, when every step of his day felt so heavy and void with the death of his brother. But he prevailed. Comfort came in the shape of his princeling, and he relents on the easeness that the prince provided. 

But even then, it was robbed off his hand when he found his princeling choking on his own pool of blood in his room, one night. The death of yet another person that he had held dear had him break, a little. 

It wasn’t even a week passed by, and he was spending more time at the library when he was attacked. He growled, shouting for his innocence, but his voice silenced the instance when the familiar figure of the young King stepped inside the library, forehead furrows deep onto his handsome face. 

“You’re condemned for the usage of magic in this land. Moreover inside this castle,” the King started. The drawl of his tone pissed Jaemin off, he had always been wanting to rip the vocal cord out from the young King’s throat. 

His heart skipped a beat. 

There’s no way the said King would know of his birth status. Seeing his frozen state, he didn’t realize that he was putting his guard down. Then he was pulled outside, iron shackles bound to his hands - incapacitated with helium, preventing him from shouting any spells. 

The sky turned grey, as they reached the top of the hill, more so dragging him up, powerless as his power was limited through the bound they kept him in. 

The Chapel people were gathered there, white robe and stupid mask hiden their face as they chanted something stimultenously. And amongst them, stand a familiar figure in front of the iron casket. 

Jaemin’s lung lunges in pain, but he pushes through, trying to break free, “No, no, no. You’re dead, you’re dead.” 

Disbelieved. He didn’t think he would see his princeling again, alive, breathing in the same air as him, again. However, Jaemin didn’t expect the turn of events. 

It felt like he was being splashed with a bucket of ice water, that the reality sets in. He was betrayed. His princeling had betrayed him, and used him to extract his secrets. 

Fury, that’s all that he could feel. It took over his spines, and every of his beings, as he stared down at the princeling. His tear stricken face froze, “You will remember this day, traitor. I wouldn’t let this day go in peace.”

“Let it go, Jaemin.” 

So, he screamed, “By heaven and hell that bound me and my soul to this ground, you shall not forget of this day. Of my death. They will hunt you even in your wake and your last breath. I swore to my sister and my brother’s blood, I will seek revenge.” 

Through his last memory, he saw Renjun’s silhouette tied by the stake, punished for being an accomplice although the said man was innocent. He was forced inside the casket, locked before the white robe of the Chapel’s people surrounded him, binded the casket with layers of irons before throwing it down the cliff, deep into the arm of the ocean. 

Water started to suffocate his view and his lungs, as he gargled the last words - embracing the pain that was slowly taking over. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Oh seven skies above, I was engulfed in these agonies without fairness. I was blinded by my own stupidity and my emotions. Listen to my pleas, dear God who made of my soul and my bodies, to the universe that put me in this pedestal of life — as these seas ravish my flesh, and the remnants of my everything, my rage will burn brighter than hell itself the moment I'm born again. He will never forget my face and my scream until the end of his days as I will never forget his. An eye for an eye, Lee._

_I will search for you._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. With flowers and my love both never to come back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess where the title come from? Ahah, you're right. It's the lyrics to Ciara Paint it Black - ugh, talking about being creative, I'm out of the field. but oh lovely, thank you for those who leave kudos to this story! (°◡°♡).:｡
> 
> bgm : ludovico einaudi's experience. 
> 
> i tried doing my research, like the peak of everything that i need to know to write this chapter down. but they might lacked or might be not accurate or doesn't make sense at all ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ) forgive me for it. especially for the court trial. 
> 
> also, warning to everyone who might read this - this chapter contain depiction of violence. some reference i used, they were from Ghostland and Us movies - although not entirely so. but you'll find some similarity with the attackers. 
> 
> Okay then, if anyone who's reading this, happy reading! (•‾⌣‾•)و ̑̑♡ english isn't my first language, so forgive me.

> **48 HOURS SINCE THE ATTACK**

There was ringing in his ear as his world spinned in void. His throat burned and just as he regained consciousness, his body repulsed in protest. The wall inside his throat felt constricted that he felt the bitter bile surge upward to his nose and he puked his guts out. Disgusted is not even a word now, when the said bile went down back to his throat, some of them stuck at the cloth that gagged inside his mouth. The bathtub was empty, no more water brimming around him. 

His clothes smell damp. Weary, petrified, nauseated - they all mixed together in a bunch. He doesn't know what’s going on anymore, or how many hours it's been. His legs have grown numb, and he couldn’t feel his hands. 

If dying is a choice, he would have taken it by no means. However, knowing that his best friends out there could probably be facing the same situation, or even worse, Jaemin felt nausea all over again. 

It doesn’t matter what he was seeing before his world blackened when he was at the verge of drowning in the pool of water in the bathtub. Nor even the tinge of something unknown that swims into his bloodstream at the moment. The sounds of trees rustling outside intensified, and foreign laughters that he couldn’t put his mind on. 

Before once again, his consciousness slipped out of his body. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


He was pacing back and forth, filling up the jar upon jars of salve for the wounded soldiers and knights that came pilling in the tent. New bandages roll here and there, and Jaemin forgets about his sore legs as he rushes toward Xiaojun’s side while treating the unconscious knight. His face was bloodied, so did the rest of his body parts. There was a big gash slit across his hands and Xiaojun, the gentle, soft Xiaojun, his hands were shaking so bad that Jaemin scooted closer and took the fresh cloth that was used to wipe the blood off, “let me.” 

Xiaojun blinked at him, surprised at his offer so Jaemin gently pry off the fingers that were holding the cloth. His friend’s face was pale, devoid of blood that tugged a string in Jaemin’s heart. Xiaojun’s eyes were bloodshot, as if he was holding on to his tears, apologizing for his sudden breakdown. He never saw his friend in such a state before, no matter how gory the patient that often walked through the door of the infirmary, back at the castle. In fact, when they received the royal order for volunteers at the physician to camp out at the war field, Xiaojun was the first person to rush and put in his name. 

“Xiao-” Jaemin held out his hands to place them on the male’s shoulder but Xiaojun raised from his position, excused himself out as he covered the lower part of his face - running toward the exit of the tent. 

Figured that he could question his friend sometime later when they were not rushing to tend to war wounds anymore, Jaemin began to get back on his feet to fix the man in front of him. He tore open the bloody shield off the chest, casting it beside the bed post and began to pull off the tunic, giving him access to the other wounds that were shields. He wiped all of the gushed out with warm water that was soaked with lavender and herbs concoction that will help to soothe the patient down. 

Jaemin needed to put extra care to the said knight, since he was badly injured. His wound couldn’t stop bleeding, he was scared that the man might die bleeding to death at that point. Earlier, when he was pushing onto the wound, the man managed to croak out in pain, before he dived back unconsciously, unaware of his surroundings. 

He had done all the things that he could possibly have done, as he glanced at the man with sympathy. Five hours have gone since yet there’s no sign of waking up. The sun has set outside, and the war has taken a pause so the others have taken it as a chance to fully rest. 

The tent has gone into an idle. The head of the physician and the other girls who tagged along were crowded at the corner of the tent, each nursing a cup of hot steaming tea. Jaemin collected the basin that was filled with bloodied water and nodded his head in acknowledgement when Sunyoung waved her hand to pursue him to join them. He mouthed ‘later’ at the group and walked outside. 

Those soldiers and knights who weren't beaten so bad, or wounded were outside, each nursing themselves for a meal. Few of them were polishing the swords and the spears. Jaemin sends them a curt smile when they nodded at him, as he walked past them - noticing the white scarf that Jaemin used to wrap around his hair. There was one or two of the soldiers that asked of his well being, asking about the situations inside the tent and of their friends so Jaemin just tried to reassure them that they will be fine. The healers were doing the best they could. 

Lot of them looked exhausted. 

Jaemin crouched down by the leg of the river, careful as to not wet his pants as he poured the water in the basin he was holding. The riverbank was void of any presence. Save for the occasional crickets sound that sang through the darkness of the night. Jaemin breathes out. His hands breached the peaceful stripe of the river water, as he twirls his wrist. Sooned, the bloodied water that he poured inside the river were separated, leaving clots of blood that Jaemin scooped out with his palm and filled up his flask. 

“You ought to be careful, you know? Magic is still forbidden on this land,” Xiaojun climbed down from the branch of the tree he was sitting on. It caught Jaemin on guard, as he gripped onto his flask earlier. 

But Xiaojun didn’t do anything. He had kneeled over beside Jaemin’s side, washing his dirty palm with the water. “My father has always told stories about your people. That the forest was alive and thriving, the water was fresh as dew - it was because of the magic that flowed in your veins. My mother - she was gifted like you too. She used to teach me all about the plants and the roots that reside in the forest that I could use to my advantage if ever I was caught in trouble.” 

Jaemin’s shoulder slouched slightly, tension slipped out of his body as he let himself to bask in the company of his friend. “Gifted, you say?” 

Xiaojun hummed, “There must be a reason why there are only certain people who have such power to carry in their body compared to us fellow humans.” 

“I never think of that way.” 

“I won’t blame you. Not after the witch hunts the Old Kings before us have put you ancestors through. I wouldn’t exactly call it a gift either.” 

Jaemin glanced to his friend’s side, “You said your mother was one of us?” 

“Um, yea, she was.”

“She was?” Xiaojun must have heard of his confusion. The healer tossed the little pebble by his side, watching it skip one or twice before falling into the pit of the river. “She died. Burned to the ground with our hut when I was eight. She made me and my father go to the town that day to buy her some stuff. Who would have known that she was trying to keep us alive by sacrificing herself.” 

That rendered him speechless, but Xiaojun doesn’t seem to be bothered by it. He continued to toss the pebble off into the river, and there was a certain heaviness that basked around him. The blood in the healer’s vein, they didn’t smell as good to Jaemin’s sense. Rotten, per say, however it could have been the situation they were supposed to deal with. Even inside the tent back then - they didn’t smell as good. 

They stayed in silence for a bit, when Xiaojun started to sniff. “I made him promise that he needed to come back alive after the war.” 

“Then he will,” Jaemin interrupts, but Xiaojun shakes his head. 

He used the end of his white clothes that all the healers wore around the waist, as makeshift extra pockets to wipe the tears that fell off his eyes, “He- he promised but it’s a foolish thing to hold on to them when you’re sending a man off to a war. They were bound to lay their lives for the crown. His blood isn't mine to withhold.” 

“Is it the man who’s lying on the bed earlier was your lover?” Jaemin softly muttered out and Xiaojun nodded. “He will wake up.” 

“Not in such a state. You should know better,” Xiaojun slowly argued, his shoulders heaving up and down in silent sobbing. So Jaemin places his arms around the male, “He will wake up,” he whispered, although it would pass through the wind. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


Xiaojun excused himself to go back to their tent. His head spinned after those crying so Jaemin reassured him that he would look after those soldiers in the tent for tonight so Xiaojun could rest. Although part of Jaemin knows that the other will mourn yet again, but this time in the comfort of his own loneliness. As much as it was comforting to have a shoulder to lean on during those low moments, the quietness of your surroundings could be your next new best friend to weep silently, to let go of the burden and heaviness without the judgment of another soul. 

Jaemin went back inside the tent, as he promised. Everyone was asleep, except for Sunyoung, who were busy filling the jars with another concoction for tomorrow. 

“Go to sleep, Sunyoung. You need them,” Jaemin takes over the pail that she was holding, sending her a stern look. “Tomorrow, you can nurse over these people again. I won’t stop you.” 

It didn’t take much of a confrontation from Jaemin’s part to make Sunyoung leave her task to him. She bid him goodnight and pat his cheeks fondly. 

He finished filling all the jars, carefully sorting them when he heard the labor breathing coming from the unconscious soldier that he treated earlier - who happened to be Xiaojun’s lover if the conversation they had earlier told him enough. 

It sounded painful. Jaemin rushed toward the man, with a pail of water. 

The poison must have seeped deeper into the man’s wound when Jaemin placed the pail of water to check on the bandages and saw them soaking heavily with the crimson liquid. The flash of his friend's sobbing state earlier flashed before his eyes, and Jaemin quickly kneeled beside the man. 

“You’re not dying, not yet. Xiaojun needs you,” he swore. “So you better fucking hold it in there,” his eyes flashes red - the same color of the blood as he pressed his palm across the man’s abdomen. He pressed his lips together, eyes staring dagger at the man as he chanted out the spells that he had memorized by heart - ignoring the choking sound that the man was letting out. 

The blood turned black, before something squiggly made its way out from the wound - Jaemin catched it before it could escape and crushed it at the end of his boot. It doesn’t let out the nicest sounds, but now that the poison is out of the man’s system, he could proceed to treat the man properly. Jaemin wiped out the sweat and the blood off the man’s flesh, applying new bandages to cover the wound. It would definitely leave a big scar when he healed but it doesn’t matter when the lives of his friend’s lover could be spared. 

The magic tingled over his fingers, but Jaemin ignored the hunger awakened from the little work spell he did earlier as he continued to clean the station. Half an hour later, he went over to hover around the man again, to check his condition and the man seemed to be breathing fine now. His breathing no longer labor, his chest pumped like he was supposed to. 

  
  
  
  


It wasn’t until the first peak of the dawn that the battleground once again rang with metal clades and the thunder from the catapults. Soldiers and archers running around, shouting orders for back up. Jaemin wakes up with a thundering headache, when he realizes he fell asleep on the makeshift table in the tent while he was trying to stay up all night. 

Nobody seemed to mind that he was sleeping. One of the girls even placed a hand on his shoulder when she saw him awake, asking if he was okay. “I’m fine,” Jaemin stated. The girl handed him a wet towel, for him to wash his face and a piece of bread. 

“Prepare yourself, I heard this will be the last day,” she mumbled, breaking apart a piece of her bread. 

Jaemin frowned, before he placed the damp cloth on his face, wiping off the sleepiness from his system. He will go to the riverside after this, to wash his face properly along with filling up a batch of new water in his clean flash - one that he was not using to collect the blood that he had separated from the water for the past two days. “That fast?” 

“Our battalion has a great defense. The enemies don't stand a chance. Although it was a bit unfortunate that it caused Sir Wong great damage this time. He was one of our front line.” 

“Sir Wong?”

The girl nodded, “The knight you treated yesterday. He looked horrible by the look of it. It was a miracle that he woke up this morning before you and demanded to be put back on the battlefield. Our prince was pretty distressed with his demands.” 

“All this happened while I was asleep?” 

The girl laughed, patting the side of Jaemin’s hand, as some sort of comfort although it doesn’t do anything of the sort. “You were exhausted. Madam Lee asked us to leave you be. You did enough yesterday. Sir Wong woke up thanks to your healing fingers.” 

Alarm rose on his head, when Ryujin mentioned his fingers. His heart suddenly picked up pace, as he studied her face for any reactions, “Healing fingers?” he asked once more, tone dripping low. 

“Oh, it’s a compliment! I forgot you haven’t grown familiar with the native language yet”. She sheepishly laughs, “I meant, you took care of him all night long, cleaning the bandages and all and now he woke up, away from the danger of death. We all thought he won’t make it, you know?” 

“He’s strong,” Jaemin concluded as final, before he munched the last pieces of his bread in the hand, ready to walk out of the tent to go to the river when Xiaojun ran inside and exert all of his weight onto him, stumbling all mess with his crying state, hugging Jaemin’s middle. 

“Oh Jaemin, thank you, thank you so much, thank you,” he jumbled out, sobbing into Jaemin’s tunic. His body shakes so hard, “If- If it weren’t for you,” He couldn’t finish his words as a fresh batch of tears falls. Jaemin lets out a small laughter, pulling the both of them out from the tent, away from the prying eyes. 

They were once again hunched over the riverside, Xiaojun’s head hidden in between his legs as he cried. Jaemin patted his back, “It’s his will to live, Xiaojun. It’s not my doing.” 

“I know you helped him last night. There’s no way he could survive those poison.” 

“It’s a bit foul on their side to drip the sword in poison in the first place. It would guarantee death, if not painstakingly slow.” 

Xiaojun wiped the remaining tears off his face, “Jaemin, no war is fair. War is grotesque at its own beauty. All for glory and the names of our kingdom. I have signed up for this the moment he was scouted to be the Royal’s knight. But,” he sucks in his breath, eyes now staring at Jaemin’s brown one, “it doesn't mean it will hurt less. Yet you spare me from that pain. You saved his life, and I owed you for my eternity.”

“Xiao-” 

The male shakes his head, pulling Jaemin’s hands into his palms, warm and gentle, “You’re my friend, Jaemin. Family, even. I know the consequences of doing magic would do to you if anyone caught you last night. Thus I never dare to ask for your help. I could be selfish, but I choose not to. Out of kindness in your heart, you show mercy for his wounded soul. Flesh and body. We will always be in debt to you. Even if it takes me to jump over the billion of universes to pay it to you, I will. And please don’t reject my offer, it’s the least I could do.”

  
  
  
  
  


> **4 HOURS BEFORE 48 HOURS END.**

“Jaemin, wake up. Wake up,” 

Jaemin wakes up with a jolt, ready to scream when Dejun’s face comes hovering over him. “Oh lord, you wake up.” Relieved wasn’t even a statement at the sight of his friend, but it was snapped in a stupor when he saw the stated Dejun was in. There bruises started forming at the side of his jawline, his lips busted and scratches all over him. His eyes were cloudless, anxious - they spoke of urgency, and Jaemin remembered his dream. 

_ Even if it takes me to jump over the billion of universes to pay it to you, I will.  _ \- His heart was beating wildly, watching as Dejun pulled out the cloth that was stuffed inside his mouth for endless hours. Soon after his mouth was bound free, Jaemin lurges forward and puke all over again, spits and biles that he had to swallow back, hideous to the plain sight - and he keeps puking until he’s heaving on empty air while Dejun pats his back. 

“Breath,” Dejun whispered. The sense of urgency was still there, lacing beneath his words. Jaemin’s head was still in the state of inertia. The black of his eyes were still trying to get used to the light that hung over them and the static white noises that seemed to buzz around him - Dejun hovered around him once again, untying the ropes around Jaemin’s hands and ankles. 

“Jaemin, focus,” Jaemin blinked slowly.  _ Is this that dream again?  _ “Jaemin, jaemin, fucking look at me.” 

Jaemin did, as Dejun gripped on both of his jawlines, his face tense as he once again looked over his shoulder, “I need you to listen to me well.” 

The blonde nods his head, still trying to figure out his locations. Dejun pushed his phone onto Jaemin’s palm, “Take this, call the police as you walk out from this room, you hear me?” 

“Yes- but Dejun, I-” 

“Renjun is in the basement, I suspect. I will get to him but you need to go out first, go inside the car, lock them and call the police for help.” 

“But you- you” he spluttered, but Dejun shakes his head. 

“Listen to me, fuck, Jaemin, please,” Dejun pleads, eyes also getting teary, “just do as I say. I don’t know who they are but they are not around. For now. They will be back, in a matter of minutes or hours and this is the only chance we got. I will get Renjun. Yukhei- Yukhei, he-,” he breaths out a deep breath and Jaemin frowns. He gripped on Dejun’s elbow, but Dejun pried them off, “We’ll be okay, okay? Just do as I say.”

“No, no, absolutely not-” Jaemin tried to stand up, about to argue but the other male wasn’t having it as he pulled on the collar of his shirt. 

“What did I say, Jaemin? Get out of here, get into the car, lock them and call the police.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  


His heart was beating faster than the blood pumping in his veins - his hands were shaky as he dialled the emergency number, terrified at each beeping noise the line was making. Dejun had to help him to get inside the car, so much with how his legs were limping - he didn’t realize how but it hurt so much when he tried to walk earlier. 

They moved as quick as they could get, and Dejun shoved the car keys inside the car, covering him with the blanket at the backseat to hide him from view as Jaemin crouched down behind the driver’s seat after locking the door as instructed. Through the thin fabric, Jaemin could see Dejun was lingering, trying to make sure he was okay before the male made a dash back inside. 

“Hi, this is the emergency-”

“Help,” Jaemin cried to the line, couldn’t wait for the operator to finish her words as he gripped on the phone tighter, “Help us please. I don’t know what happened but we got attacked and, and-” 

“Sir, can you please calm down and tell me of your exact location so we can help?” 

Jaemin sobs, “We- we were at-” 

Then he heard the engine pulling in beside him, and the sound of the door opened just right beside him. Paranoia slipped through him when he realized that Dejun and Renjun were still inside, probably didn’t know that the attackers just came back. 

“Sir?” 

He whispered the location of the cabin after he knew that the attackers were out of his sight, “quick, please. They just come back and Dejun- Renjun, they were still inside-” 

“Sir, calm down, okay? I need you to stay with me on the phone. We already dispatched a team to your location. Can you tell me what happened?” 

The blonde merely sobs into the line, shutting his eyes closed. He was terrified. “I don’t know. We were on vacation and I don’t know-” 

“It’s okay, sir. Take a deep breath. The team is on its way.” 

“Is it going to take a long time?” Jaemin pushed. He couldn’t sit still, not when he realized that his friends were still inside. His head was trying too hard to keep calm, and to follow what Dejun had told him to do. And he did just that, but Dejun didn’t instruct him to stay inside for how long. So, he pulled the blanket off him and tried to peek outside through the window. 

It was a wrong move.

One of the attackers saw him and charged toward the car so Jaemin screamed hysterically, falling to his back as he watched the attacker trying to pull open the car door. 

“Sir? Sir, what’s going on?” 

The phone fell off to the backseat, and the attacker, realizing that the car door was locked, backed away from it. He looked around, and at that moment, Jaemin knew that the guy was trying to break the window and unlock the latch. 

When the attacker saw the block of wood nearby the porch, he turned back at Jaemin, smiling sinisterly. Their eyes locked, and Jaemin feels all blood drained out of his systems. So when the guy walked off from the door to grab onto the block of wood, Jaemin scooted to the other side and unlatched the lock to open it, before making a dash outside, straight into their cabin. 

“Dejun!” He yells frantically. Then he heard the loud thudding sounds that come from the door that lead to the basement. “Renjun!” 

Ignoring the sharp pain on his ankle, he ran toward the door and climbed downstairs. The sight of the basement floor shocked him. When they rented the cabin, the owner had forewarned them to not go down the basement since it had pretty much all the old furniture and the stairs were kinda old. The old generator was located downstairs too but he told them that there was no need for that since the cabin has been renovated to accommodate guests every day. It just kinda of a hassle to clean all of them, thus why the owner decided to just leave it there in the basement. 

However, instead of the rusty, dusty space that he had expected to see, the basement was decorated nicely, disturbingly so – instead of the mentioned old furniture and old useless junk, he saw a room filled with dolls. Some of them were missing limbs; few of them were destroyed, melted body parts, caged in a bird cage. A long fancy couch, that looks vintage and more dolls thrown on it. Long mirrors and vanity tables of makeup and bottles of what Jaemin doesn’t want to guess at all. There were candle light holders preps against the wall, litting the basement in such dim yellow lighting, and the smell of something burning that so strong that he almost dwell over and puke if it weren’t for the grunts and screams that tumbled off from Dejun who’s climbing onto the second guy, bigger than his size - bigger than either three of them in all honesty, hitting the man’s face repeatedly with what look like another candle holder. 

“Jaemin!” Renjun gasps. Words stuck out of Jaemin’s throat for the worth of it, as he could only stare in horror. 

There’s no time to waste, the police are on its way, he was sure. It probably wouldn’t take long before the other attacker realized that he had run off from inside the car and would search for him. Jaemin runs toward Renjun, who had his hands shackled to the wall. The inside of his stomach twisted, seeing the horrible makeup that was put on his best friend’s face. White powder covered Renjun’s entire features, poorly applied mascara that was ruined by his tears, and horrible red lipsticks that were all over his lips. 

He didn’t ask why Renjun was wearing the ugly white dress that has extreme intricate lace over his pajamas. His best friend was sobbing, as Renjun grabbed hold of Jaemin’s sleeves as the blonde tried to search for the key to unlock the shackle, “It’s on his neck,” Renjun told him. 

“Dejun, the key, it’s on his neck,” Jaemin holds Renjun’s hand for reassurance, before he dived forward, collided with Dejun and the attacker, who were still brawling against each other. It caused Dejun to fall off from the attacker, giving it enough chance for the said man to climb onto him, locking him in between the legs as he choked Dejun. 

Gaining his gravity back, Jaemin crawled from the side - the attacker was unaware of his approaching silhouette since he was busy choking Dejun with both of his hands. Jaemin picked up an abandoned candle holder that Dejun used to attack the attacker earlier and bashed it with all of his might against the back of the attacker’s head. 

The attacker fell on top of Dejun instantly. Renjun screamed, out of shock when the blood came out from the impact, “Is he dead, is he dead?” 

Jaemin lets go of the candle holder, and pushes the body off Dejun, “Quick.” Dejun rolled to his side, chest heaving up and down heavily, catching on his breath, away from the attacker as Jaemin maniacally rummaged through the thick coat that the attacker was wearing for the key. 

“His neck, Nana.” Renjun reminded him, fretting, and Jaemin’s eyes roamed at the attacker’s neck to look for the key. True enough, the silver key was attached to the necklace that the attacker was wearing. Jaemin ripped off the key from the attacker's neck. 

He crawled back to Renjun’s side, inserting the key into the lock of the shackle to free his best friend. Once free, Renjun fell into his arm, sobbing. “Shush, it’s okay, I got you. Let’s get out from here.” 

“Where’s Yukhei?” Renjun asked, looking between Jaemin and Dejun, but Dejun ignored them. He scrambled to his feet and picked up a fruit knife from the vanity table. “He’s around. Let’s go before he wakes up.” 

“Dejun-” Jaemin called out, helping Renjun to stand up but the male had already climbed up the stairs. 

Leaving them no choice, they followed suit from behind, carefully. Dejun was perched behind the basement door, peeking over it. When Jaemin and Renjun were just behind him, he turned to stare at them both. His lips pursed into a straight line, “I-”

Jaemin reached out for his hand - Renjun too, as comfort. “We’ll get through this, okay? The police are on its way. Let’s hold on till then - hide somewhere until they come,” 

Dejun didn’t reply, merely giving them the last glance before he pushed the door open slowly. Much to their dismay, the other attackers have realized that Jaemin wasn’t in the car and have been ransacking the whole house to search for the blonde. However, there was something a bit odd about the attacker duo. The one that they attacked earlier, fainted in the basement, as much as his body built were bigger than all of them combined - humongous but he looked like he was suffering from some kind of mental issue. Instead of talking, he merely grunted and let out a few gibberish words as Dejun was hitting him with the candle holder. 

While the other one, he’s wearing a wig apparently - he seemed to be perfectly aligned with reality. The mastermind of it all. Jaemin suspected that it was the same one who had dunked his head in the bathtub before. They were waiting for the wig guy to go elsewhere when the same man walked out from the kitchen, dragging Yukhei who fainted across the floor - blood trailing behind him. 

Jaemin didn’t get to hold Dejun, before Dejun barged out from behind the door and ran into the wig man, jumping on his back, causing the wig man to stumble forward, but it wasn’t enough. They get into a small fight, as the wig man tries to rid Dejun from his back as Dejun tightens his hold against the man’s neck, stabbing on the man’s shoulder repeatedly. 

  
  


The man roared in pain, shoving himself backward against the glass cupboard where the plates were kept, crushing Dejun in between. Sounds of plates and glasses breaking tear through the room. But Dejun refused to let go of his hold, even if he could feel some of the glass shard stuck to his back.

“Dejun!” Jaemin shouted. The blonde stepped out from behind the door. Renjun trembled behind him, gripping on the back of his shirt to hold him from running out to the attacker too. “Don’t - Nana, we- you said the police are coming. Let’s just wait, huh?” he whimpered. 

“Jun-”

“No, no. Please no.” 

Jaemin realized it too late. 

Dejun and the wig man were still wrestling, they were rolling on the ground, on the scattering glasses, seeking dominance. The wig man threw a punch toward Dejun, pretty strong considering the loud sounds that it emit and Dejun fell to his side, crying in pain. Then the wig man hovered on top of his leg, pulling him away from the knife that fell off Dejun’s hand. 

Jaemin was about to run there to help, when Renjun screech and their hands break apart - snatch away when the bald man, the attacker who they thought dead, bleeding in the basement picked Renjun up, before throwing him against the wall. 

Shocked, Jaemin staggered away from his place, eyes following Renjun who were thrown to the side like a ragdoll. The bald man saw Dejun, who tried to crawl to pick up the knife back and yowped loudly. He looked angry. 

“Nghh, nghh,” he bellowed, then he turned around to face Jaemin, who he remembered was the one that had smashed the candle holder to his head. He scowled. 

Blood drained out of Jaemin’s face as he dashed out toward the front door. The bald man ran after him, grunting incoherent words from his mouth as if Jaemin would understand him. They ran outside - Jaemin barefooted as he scurried away from the cabin’s front porch, onto the wet grass outside - darting into the forest when he tripped on one of the big branches that grew on the ground, falling to his face and knees. 

The bald man caught up to him, gripping on his ankle that was hurt, twisting it further as he dragged him back toward the cabin and Jaemin cried in pain, trying to grab onto the ground - the branch or anything that his hand could reach out but failed. 

He dragged Jaemin, mercilessly back to the front porch. Just then, the blaring sound of the police siren cut through the evening skies. And Jaemin couldn’t be more grateful as he struggled to escape. It just agitated the bald man onward as he kicked Jaemin’s rib to make the blonde stop moving. 

There were shouts from the officer that got out from the patrol car, but the bald man didn’t pay attention to it, too busy wiggling Jaemin’s ankle in his hand like a dangling doll. His energy was seeping out of Jaemin's body. He was too exhausted to fight, his body hurt so much. 

He saw two of the officers come forward at him to get him out of the bald man’s grip. They had to shoot the bald man’s knees and other officers, including the ambulance, came to the rescue. 

The officer carried him toward the ambulance, as his head lulled to the side, toward the cabin, mouthing his friend’s name. They put him on the gurney, pressing the oxygen mask to his mouth. He saw the other officers escorted two other gurneys. And another one, who they had covered entirely and there were blood seeping through the white cloth. 

Jaemin bolted out of his position, hyperventilated at the sight - he was thrashing to run toward his friend when one of the ambulance guys held him strongly as the other quickly injected diazepam into his system. Then everything blacked out. 

  
  
  
  


> **THE COURT PROCEEDING, HALF AN HOUR IN.**

  
  


After their lawyer gave the opening statement of their case, the jury had called out the first witness to take the stance. Renjun gripped on Jaemin’s hand, before he stands up and walked toward the front, swearing his oath to the whole court. 

“Can you please state what’s your name?”

Renjun breathes out into the microphone, nodding, “Huang Renjun.” 

“Huang Renjun. You’re one of the victims from the attack back in the Cabin at the outskirts of this town, right?” 

“Yes.” 

“Do you know of the owner that owned the cabin beforehand and one of your friends rented them for your vacation?” 

“No. We didn’t know. Yukhei got his contact information from one of the travelling websites of the town nearby.” 

“So, it was Yukhei who arranged your guy's accommodation and place to stay?” 

“Yes. He was in charge of those duties. All of us have each duties assigned respectively.” 

“What are yours?” 

“Food. And beverages.” 

“Can you tell the court what happened? In your own words, please.”

Jaemin can see that Renjun’s hands were trembling from the seat, and their eyes meet midway before Renjun nodded, once again. 

“We were going for a vacation, away from the city. The four of us. Three days vacation. It was doing fine. During the last two day, we were going for a sight seeing around the town before we went back to the cabin because it was getting darker. Everyone was exhausted. We had dinner, and we hung out for a bit at the front porch. Then Dejun excused himself out first to go to sleep, then Yukhei. I was texting my partner at that time when Jaemin told me to go to sleep.” 

“Can you please point out who’s Jaemin in the crowd?” 

Renjun slowly pointed his fingers at Jaemin, who’s sitting rigid on his seat, before continuing, “We went to sleep around past eleven. I had just finished showering when I saw the bald guy standing there in front of the toilet so I screamed. I blacked out most of the time, but the moment I woke up, I was shackled to the wall. The wig man was dolling me up to be some kind of a doll and he told me to be nice, and don’t let out any noise if I don’t want to get killed. So I agreed because I’m scared. Then he called up for the bald guy downstairs, into the basement.”

“So you were held in the basement?”

“Yes, I don’t know the other’s whereabouts.”

“Alright. Proceed.” 

“The bald man was playing with the dolls in the basement. He was burning them with the candle, tearing their limb apart. I wanted to cry but the warning got me to swallow down the urge. It wasn’t until he came at me with the candle. He wanted to burn my face out with the candle, probably wanting them to melt like the wax just like the doll did. I screamed, and pushed the candle away. He beat me up afterwards, until I kept quiet.”

Jaemin tuned out of the rest, held his breath as Renjun continued to tell the court of what happened. He mentioned how he needed to pretend to be a doll for the long hours ended, and play hide and seek with the bald man while he was shackled. The iron shackle was long enough for him to move around, but it wasn't long enough for Renjun to escape the room and run to the stairs. 

He also mentioned about the bald man’s odd fascination by sniffing onto the doll crotches, before biting into them and melting them away by the candles - laughing and jumping with joy. 

The court proceedings continued, as the lawyers presented the pictures taken from the scene. It ended afterwards, the verdict was held since they couldn’t get the whole statement out from the witnesses. 

Two of the attackers were put behind the jailed. They were held for three multiple attempt murder, murders of seven other victims that scattered across three countries, aggravated sexual abuse and harrasment and aggravated identity theft, along with couple other crimes that the prosecutors had listed. 

It turned out, the cabin that they were renting has been abandoned for quite a while now because the real owner, Park Seojung, has gone missing for three months. There were no contacts and trails of his disappearance. Unfortunately for them, Yukhei had found the owner’s contact number and had arranged to rent the cabin for their vacation with one of the attackers - the wig man instead of the owner.

They were targeted from the beginning. That explained why they get access into the cabin that night. 

The body of the cabin real owner was found stashed behind the wall, wrapped inside plastic wrapping when the police teams were instigating the crime scene. And some other body parts of their previous victims. 

When the police arrived, it was too late. 

Dejun apparently didn’t survive. His head was bashed against the floor coupled of time, and few stabbing wounds and the glasses that stuck from their wrestling with the wig man. 

When they flashed on the screen, Jaemin’s heart clenched. Renjun was silently sobbing beside him as he kept his face devoid of expressions. He remembered Dejun’s last glance and their hands against each other before the male ran out of the door to attack their attacker. If it weren’t for Dejun, either any of them would make it out alive. 

He remembered the relief that befell onto him when Dejun ripped off the cloth that was wrapped around his eyes, and pulled out of the cloth that gagged into his mouth. Of their promises to be okay, and they will get out of that situation, unscathed. 

Now, he was gone. Dejun was gone. Yukhei was hospitalized, in a comatose state, tube connecting to his mouth as he was holding on to the oxygen tank beside him. No one knows what had truly gone down between the two of them - not Dejun could tell since he was no longer there with them nor Yukhei, since he was not in such a state to give a statement. 

Dejun’s funeral will be held in a matter of three days. And Jaemin doesn’t know what he will tell Yukhei when the man woke up - if he ever woke up from his coma. 

Somewhere, in the midst of his consciousness, Jaemin heard that voice again as they walked out of the court - cameras flashing of the reporters wanting to ask them of what happened. 

The same voice that he had heard when he was blacked out in the bathtub - the same very voice that he had grown accustomed with for seven years of his life. 

_ Even if it takes me to jump over the billion of universes to pay it to you, I will. _

In this life, Dejun had paid his debt toward him, in a form of his life in exchange for saving his lover back then. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter dedicated mostly to Dejun. 
> 
> i have fun writing the overlaps between the past them and the present them honestly. Although I did gave the draft to my partner, since they wanted to read it and keep spamming our iM chatbox with they sad stickers and cursed me afterwards. what Dejun did was very honorable. he knew what he was getting into when he decided to save everyone. although he didn't planned on dying, because nobody does. but we couldn't expect things to just smoothly gone by as we planned, right? 
> 
> alas, let's expect things to be more intense for the upcoming chapter! ╰(✿´⌣`✿)╯♡


End file.
